The Engagement Page 7

  Elizabeth stared at her mother, not fully believing what she had just heard. Since her and Jane’s engagement, Mrs. Bennet’s demeanour was vastly improved. She was always cheerful and smiling. However, when it came to overall silliness and stupidity, she had not been permanently cured of those.

  Elizabeth was about to respond sharply to the nonsense that came from her mother’s mouth when she felt Jane reaching for her hand and giving it a light squeeze. Taking a calming breath, she counted to ten, fighting the urge to bash her mother. She knew that it would give no result. Mrs. Bennet was incorrigible. No matter what Elizabeth said, she would always think of Lydia as the best of her daughters, even though the girl had nearly ruined their entire family with her selfishness and recklessness. If not for Darcy, neither of the Bennet sisters would now have a chance for a good marriage, or any marriage at all. Whereas Lydia would be living in disgrace, not being admitted in polite society.

  “Tell me, Sister, what are your ideas for Jane and Elizabeth’s wedding gowns?” Mrs. Gardiner asked, clearly wishing to change the topic of the conversation, bringing it to safer shores. “I am very curious.”

  Mrs. Bennet went off immediately about what designs she was considering. Soon they were looking through many fashion magazines which Mrs. Gardiner had in her collection.

  Elizabeth breathed in relief that the attention was taken away from her. She looked at Jane gratefully. Her sister read her well and always knew when she was about to lose her patience with their mother. She would miss Jane very much once she moved north after the wedding.

  She was glad that she listened to Darcy and did not try to discuss with Jane what she had witnessed that night at Netherfield. After longer consideration, she had to admit that Darcy was perfectly right in pointing out that it was too intimate a matter to discuss without any encouragement from Jane. As her sister never brought the subject up, it was left to Elizabeth to stay silent about it.

  It was the second day of their stay in London. She had not seen Darcy since the day before yesterday and she was already longing for his company. He was in London with Georgiana and Mr. Bingley, and they were to dine at Darcy’s townhouse tomorrow evening.

  As soon as they had arrived yesterday evening, Mrs. Bennet had announced that she had no intention to waste any of the precious time during their stay in London. They were to start visiting shops today. Mrs. Gardiner would not be able to join them. Elizabeth understood that her aunt, being almost seven months pregnant with her fourth child, could hardly venture for long and tiresome trips, but nevertheless she would have preferred for her to join them. Her presence would make the day much more bearable. Contrary to her sisters, shopping for gowns, hats, shoes and gloves was her least favourite pastime. She would much prefer to visit some of the town’s best bookshops.

  Nevertheless, she had to admit that her mother had an excellent taste in clothes. Mrs. Bennet had the ability to pick up materials and designs which looked more expensive than they truly were.

  Elizabeth expected the day to be long, tiresome and tedious, but it proved to be much worse. At first she was surprised when Mrs. Bennet ordered to drive them to Bond Street, where most of the shops were above their financial means. She had expected that they would go to the seamstress not far from Cheapside which Mrs. Gardiner frequented.

  Her astonishment only grew when her mother entered the expensive-looking shop with tall windows right in the middle of Bond Street. Mrs. Bennet walked up to an elegant but severely dressed lady, who turned out to be the owner of the establishment, talking to her quietly. It was rather strange, as her mother rarely used shushed tones when addressing anyone.

  Soon, Elizabeth, Jane, and Mrs. Bennet were seated on the sofa, tea and refreshments served to them while they looked at the many materials and designs. Elizabeth grew alarmed when she saw the quality of the materials which her mother had been selecting. She knew that their father had no money to pay for all these. What was her mother thinking? “Mama, are you certain that Papa can afford it?” she whispered in her mother’s ear.

  Mrs. Bennet kept smiling at the owner, who was discussing what kind of fur should be used for Elizabeth’s winter coat. She would need one for the much colder weather in the north. “Surely you do not think that your father is paying for all this?” Mrs. Bennet whispered back, before asking loudly how long it would take to finish the coat and whether there was the possibility of sending it directly to Derbyshire.

  Elizabeth sat numbly for a moment longer, not saying a single word. The emotions which she felt were many, and none of them were pleasant. Embarrassment and humiliation were the strongest. Had her mother talked Darcy into it? Had she accosted him to pay for all those clothes? She would have thought her mother to have more tact. They were not beggars, and she would be perfectly happy with less expensive gowns made by Mrs. Gardiner’s seamstress.

  Barely paying attention to what was spoken around her, she was led away into another room and asked to undress. While her measurements were taken, she wondered why Jane did not join her in here. Only then it struck her that Jane was not picking any materials for herself today, she only advised what should suit Elizabeth. Poor Jane! She was sitting there, looking pleased and content, even though none of those lovely things would be for her.

  Elizabeth could not wait for them to leave the shop. As soon as they were inside the carriage, she turned to Mrs. Bennet. “Mama, did you talk Mr. Darcy into this?”

  “What are you speaking of?”

  “Did you talk him into paying for my new dresses?”

  “I did not. He approached me about it himself. He gave me the address of the shop that we have just been to, saying that his sister frequented it and it was all settled to put your expenses on his account.”

  “Why did you not refuse him?”

  Her mother stared at her with amazement. “Refuse such a kind offer? Why would I do such a thing?”

  “Do you not posses any pride, Mother?”

  “Lizzy!” Jane exclaimed softly. “I am certain that Mama only wished for the best.”

  “Listen to your sister for once, Elizabeth,” Mrs. Bennet said. “By accepting Mr. Darcy’s generosity we can afford better gowns for Jane.”

  “I would much prefer to have lesser dresses but from the same seamstress as my sister,” Elizabeth argued.

  “You will be mistress of a grand estate and you have to look like one. What would the servants think if you arrived there in the second-best dresses in your trunk?”

  “I do not care! You humiliated me!”

  “What are you speaking of?” Mrs. Bennet enquired, looking truly concerned. “Truly, Elizabeth, sometimes I am worried that you are becoming mentally deranged.”

  “Lizzy, Lizzy, look at me,” Jane said, forcefully reaching for both of Elizabeth’s hands. “We will talk about it later tonight. You must calm down. Both Mr. Darcy and Mama had only your best interest at heart.”

  Elizabeth nodded slowly. She glanced over at her mother, who looked both terrified and greatly worried.

  “I think that it is best we return home now,” Jane proposed. “We shall start again early in the morning tomorrow.”

  “Very well, Jane,” Mrs. Bennet agreed, stealing wary glances at her second daughter, who was sitting quietly, staring down at her hands.

  Once they returned to Cheapside, Mrs. Gardiner was awaiting them impatiently, wishing to hear all the news about the shopping they had accomplished today.

  Elizabeth excused herself as soon as she could, citing a headache. Mrs. Gardiner gave her a concerned but understanding look. She knew that shopping was not Elizabeth’s favourite activity.

  ***

  Elizabeth was resting calmly on the bed even though her insides were in turmoil. It felt very wrong to her that Darcy was paying for her clothes before the wedding. She could not think about it otherwise or rationalize his deed in her mind in any way. She was hardly surprised with her mother’s ready acceptance of Darcy’s offer. However, she could not believe t
hat Darcy had come with such an idea on his own, presenting it to Mrs. Bennet behind Elizabeth’s back without her knowledge. Did he not understand that she already felt indebted to him for dealing with Wickham and all the money he had spent to force him into marrying Lydia?

  She did not open her eyes when she heard a knock at the door, followed by someone entering the room. She guessed that it was Jane, but she did not wish to talk even to her sister at the present moment.

  “Lizzy, my dear, how are you feeling?”

  Elizabeth opened her eyes to see Mrs. Bennet standing next to the bed. She could not remember the last time when her mother had come to see her when she had been upset.

  Then Mrs. Bennet leaned down, whispering, “Mr. Darcy and Mr. Bingley have just arrived. Mr. Darcy is here. When he heard that you were unwell he insisted on seeing you. Have mercy on us all and be polite to him.”

  Elizabeth sat up, watching as her mother walked to the door, opening it wide to let Darcy in.

  “Thank you, Mrs. Bennet,” Darcy responded as the woman left them alone, closing the door after herself.

  Elizabeth put her legs on the floor, sitting up.

  Darcy made his way to her with haste. “How are you feeling?” he enquired, cupping her cheek. “They told me that you had a headache.”

  “Shopping is not a favourite pastime of mine,” she explained quietly, enjoying his touch on her skin.

  He stared into her face for a moment longer before leading them to the small sofa only large enough to accommodate two people. He sat down first, pulling her onto his lap. “Has something upset you?” he enquired. “Your mother?”

  Elizabeth pulled back to look into his eyes. “Mama said that you offered to pay for my dresses.”

  “I did.”

  “Why did you do it?”

  “I do not understand.”

  “Why did you make such an offer to her? You must have guessed that she would agree.”

  “Why should I not? I assumed that it would be convenient for you to make your purchases at the same shop where Georgiana does hers. If you do not like this seamstress, you can look for someone different.”

  “You have already spent a fortune to pay off Wickham, to rescue Lydia’s reputation. And now this? Can you imagine how humiliated I felt today when I realized that all the bills would be sent directly to you?” She got off his lap, walking to the window.

  “Be reasonable, Elizabeth. In two months we shall be married.”

  “We are not married yet.”

  He stood as well, and began pacing the room. “I do not see what is upsetting you so much.”

  “How can you not see it? Imagine Georgiana or even our own daughter in such a situation in the years to come. Would you allow their betrotheds to pay for their expenses before the wedding?”

  “Of course not. However, our situation is entirely different. Our daughter or Georgiana will never lack in any way, especially when it comes to purchasing a few gowns.”

  “I do not see it to be different. My father has money to pay for my expenses. I would be much happier with the dresses bought at the shop where my aunt does hers.”

  “In Cheapside?”

  The way he said ‘Cheapside’ stung. Elizabeth grimaced inwardly. It was the same tone which Caroline Bingley had used once when referring to her aunt and uncle’s place of residence.

  “Yes, in Cheapside,” she responded. “Mrs. Gardiner is a very elegant woman, you cannot deny that.”

  “Elizabeth, I can hardly believe that we are even discussing it,” he said, coming to stand in front of her. “Let me explain. You are about to enter a different social sphere and you must look the part of my wife. Your father cannot afford to pay for the right kind of clothes for you, especially with Jane’s expenses coming at the same time. By offering to take care of your account now, I was thinking ahead. Once we are at Pemberley, I wish to concentrate solely on my wife, on spending time with her in my ancestral home. I do not wish to worry that I need to take her to town when she needs new gowns because the ones that she has are more suited for my housekeeper than the mistress of Pemberley. I simply want to have you all to myself for those first months. I want for us to stay home and enjoy our privacy.”

  Elizabeth looked down at her hands. Darcy was rich, but she had never felt as inferior to him as now, not even when she had visited Pemberley for the first time, seeing its grandeur. Had he truly seen her like that from the beginning of their acquaintance? As the girl dressed too poorly to stand by his side?

  His arms went around her. “Please, Elizabeth, no more of this,” he spoke gently, touching her cheek. “We cannot allow such a silly matter to ruin our happiness. I do appreciate your independence and pride, but it is not needed here. We both know that you are not marrying me because of my fortune. You would not have refused me so decidedly the first time if it were the case. Please,” he whispered, touching her lips with his. When she did not respond, he pulled back. “I came here today because I could not live another hour without seeing you, and this is the welcome I am receiving?”

  She smiled at him then, but it was unconvincing even to her.

  Darcy was not deterred with her lack of enthusiasm. He kissed her again, more deeply this time.

  A knock at the door made them stop their amorous activities.

  Jane’s clear, high voice was heard. “Lizzy, Aunt is inviting Mr. Darcy and you to join us for tea in the drawing room.”

  “Yes, Jane. We shall come downstairs in a moment.”

  Darcy groaned, hiding his face in the curve of her neck.

  “Less than two months, less than two months,” she heard him murmuring.

  “Two months?” she asked.

  “Our wedding,” he explained, straightening up his tall frame. “I am beginning to think that the engagement is the least pleasant part out of the entire courtship.”

  “You are not enjoying it?” she asked, walking to the mirror on the wall to repin some curls which had escaped the bun. Darcy joined her, standing behind her, watching the back of her neck.

  “It is frustrating. You are mine, but still I cannot spend as much time with you as I would wish to.”

  Elizabeth turned to face him. “As you said, it will be in less than two months.”

  He leaned down to kiss her forehead. “Let us hurry, or they will start looking for us again.”

  Elizabeth accepted his arm, allowing him to lead them downstairs. She was still not pleased about his unneeded—in her opinion—generosity. However, although she still did not like what he had done, she decided to reconsider it before returning to this topic again.

  She would talk with Jane tonight. Her sister was always capable of offering sound advice on such matters.

  ***

  “Why should you feel humiliated, Lizzy?” Jane asked her later that night.

  The sisters sat on the bed in their nightclothes, the single candle illuminating the room. They had to share the room, as the Gardiners did not have enough guest chambers to put them separately.

  “He should not have said to Mama that he would pay for the dresses, knowing well that she would have never refused such an offer.”

  “I am certain that it was not Mr. Darcy’s intention to offend you in any way.”

  “But he did,” Elizabeth argued. “He made me feel inferior when he said that my gowns were more suitable for his housekeeper than a mistress of Pemberley.”

  “It was inconsiderate of him to say that, but Lizzy, he is not perfect, no one is. I do think that his intentions were good.”

  “I should forget about it, then?” Elizabeth asked.

  “You should make him aware if there is something which you dislike in his behaviour. However, I do not think that it is a good idea to return to it over and over again like Mama does when Papa acts in a way which she dislikes.”

  Elizabeth nodded her head. She was determined to avoid her mother’s mistakes in her own marriage.

  “I do believe that in time Mr. Darcy will beco
me more sensitive to your needs and feelings. Do not be too harsh on him. I do not believe that he would ever offend you purposely.”

  Elizabeth sighed. “You are right, Jane, as always. You are always taking into consideration every perspective first before making a judgement. I wish to be more like you, but I allow my feelings and emotions to rule me so very often.”

  “One cannot change one’s nature. Mr. Darcy likes you the way you are. You should follow his example in that respect.”

  Chapter Eight

  The following day Elizabeth began with the new resolution to enjoy it as much as possible even though there was more shopping planned. They spent the entire morning and most of the afternoon in the company of the seamstress Mrs. Gardiner favoured, discussing the dresses for Jane. Elizabeth felt much happier and more comfortable when her elder sister was in the centre of attention instead of her. Jane looked beautiful in most colours and designs, thus it was difficult to limit her selections to only a few to suit her the best.

  They returned home well after three in the afternoon, which left them a little time to rest and prepare themselves for dinner at Darcy’s townhouse. It had been agreed yesterday that Darcy would send his carriage for Elizabeth, Jane, and Mrs. Bennet.

  Jane and Elizabeth were dressing themselves in their bedroom when their mother entered, announcing that she was unable to accompany them. She claimed a severe headache prevented her from joining her daughters. Elizabeth had no other choice but to believe that her mother was truly unwell, as she could not imagine that Mrs. Bennet would voluntarily forego attending dinner in Mayfair.

  It was promptly decided that Jane and Elizabeth should not go alone, thus Mr. Gardiner was asked to escort them. However, he excused himself from the task, quoting tiredness. Elizabeth and Jane had decided to go alone when Mrs. Gardiner volunteered to join them. She was eager to escape the house after being closed up for the last several months. While it was not customary for a woman so far in her condition to attend parties, they were invited to a private house, about to spend the evening within a small circle of close friends soon to become family, thus it did not seem inappropriate.